Luuurve is a Many Trousered Thing by Louise Rennison

Author:Louise Rennison [Louise Rennison]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
Published: 2007-01-26T05:00:00+00:00

8:20 a.m.

My charming but insane sister is on the telephone. The fact that she has the receiver upside down and that there is no one on the other end of it doesn’t seem to spoil her little chat. She was saying, “I know, yes, yes, Mr Bum Bum is coming to school today in his poo pants! Hehehehehahahahaha lalalalalala.” Then she started snorting and shouted, “Bye-bye arsey!!!” and slammed down the receiver.

When she saw me she came over and wanted to be picked up. She’s not small and quite hefty. I had to lean against the door to use it as a support. Once I had managed to pick her up, she started kissing me. “I lobe you, I lobe you my hairy sister, I looooooooobe you.”

Hairy sister? Has she seen something I haven’t? Has the orang-utan gene leaped out to be friends with the lurker? I put her down and distracted her by saying, “Look, Bibbs, Angus is doing a big poo in Vati’s tie drawer.” Which actually he was.

I went into the bathroom.

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